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Custom Mishap Incinerator Edit

The Sceptre Incorporated Custom Mishap Incinerator is a highly controversial and experimental system which is described as 'The System To End ALL Problems' in the Sceptre Incorporated Custom Mishap Incinerator User Guide. It was created by one of the Master Scientists of Sceptre, Dr [Redacted] at the request of Sceptre's Founder, to cover up any Mishaps that should occur during Trial Science or Finalised Science .

FunctionEdit

The Science behind this device is mostly unknown and untested but seems to operate as follows:

1. Humans: A Kinetic Conscience Locator finds any person with the reported Mishap (known as Mishap Carrier) located in their Cognitive Centre (or Brain). The neurones storing the information about the Mishap are found by the Conscience Locator and these coordinates are then passed on to the Remote Neurone Incinerator. The Remote Neurone Incinerator then remotely incinerates said neurones, causing intense pain and often brain damage for the Mishap Carrier.

2. Files and Machines: In parallel to the above, a Kinetic File Storage Locator and a Remote Hard-drive Incinerator perform the same task as the above, but for electronic devices.

3. Physical Evidence: The Kinetic Real-Space Object Locator finds any physical object pertaining to the Mishap and passes the coordinates to the The Hypercube-Based Object Collector. This then teleports the Mishap pertaining objects to The Real-Space Object Incinerator, which promply incinerates them.

4. You may now lean back in your Sceptre Inc. Standard Office Chair and relax in the knowledge that no one is ever going to know about your Science-related Mishap.

ControversyEdit

Carpet ControversyEdit

It is speculated that this is the reason the Sceptre Inc. Custom Mishap Incinerator is stored under a carpet, is in order to prevent it's discovery, as he discovery of the Sceptre Inc. Custom Mishap Incinerator constitutes a Trail Science Mishap. This is in itself controversial, due to the fact that the very discovery of the Sceptre Inc. Custom Mishap Incinerator requires the use of the Sceptre Inc. Custom Mishap Incinerator.

The Remote Neurone IncineratorEdit

The source of this controversy is no doubt due to one very minor component in the Sceptre Inc. Custom Mishap Incinerator; The Remote Neurone Incinerator. Both the Creator of the Machine, Dr [Redacted] and the Founder of Sceptre Inc. fail to see why this is so. Should this ever come to the attention of outside investors or the Government, Dr [Redacted] feels that the Sceptre Inc. Custom Mishap Incinerator would be useful to remove all trace of this Mishap.

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